Having watched "Fortress Besieged" again, my petty thoughts have grown stronger, and I increasingly feel that the fortress is a true reflection of Qian Zhongshu's married life. Moreover, because he wrote "Fortress Besieged," he has surrounded himself with a Great Wall outside the fortress, making it difficult for him to escape.
There is no doubt that this connects what Yang Jiang referred to as a "completely fabricated" novel to the author himself; it can be said that it is a case of a petty mind trying to gauge a gentleman's heart.
Why do I have such petty thoughts? Why didn't I have petty thoughts about Nabokov? Why didn't I suspect that he had been to "Lolita Island" just because he wrote "Lolita"? Although at that time, Epstein hadn't bought that island yet.
I couldn't find the reason and could only repeatedly tell myself the fact that it is "completely fabricated." But the more I tell myself, the less I can believe it. So I wanted to see if others also had the same petty thoughts, hoping to find spiritual solace and alleviate my own guilt. Then I discovered that they harbored the same guilt as I did, and their crimes were glaringly obvious.
Is this a case of sour grapes? I don't know the answer, but it seems there is already an answer. That is, for the grapes that cannot be reached, people can imagine them to be not only sour but also sweet. Why would they be sweet? Because they cannot be reached. The more unreachable they are, the sweeter they become. For these sweet grapes, people are willing to worship them as gods, feeling no remorse in doing so.
What leads me and my kind to believe that this grape is sour? I believe it is "Fortress Besieged" itself. It is the source of all evil, the fundamental reason why the grape turns sour.
I personally think that the feelings between Qian and Yang were certainly love at first; at that time, Yang Jiang might have had some qualities similar to Tang Xiaofu in Qian Zhongshu's eyes. However, after marriage, she transformed into Sun Roujia in his heart. Their relationship gradually changed from love to a relative of love.
It is difficult to judge the closeness of this relative; both sides may have different understandings. However, from Lao Qian's perspective, it may not be particularly close. But this does not hinder the good maintenance of their relationship, as besides the traditional rules, they also need to adhere to a behavioral norm called "Fortress Besieged."
Perhaps most love eventually turns into a relative of love. As for what it looks like afterward, it depends on the closeness of this relative.